Obadiah

That moment in church when the pastor says, "Open your bibles with me to Obadiah" and your brain starts to check out (Wanda, if you are reading this, don't tell Bruce!  It gets better, I promise!).

Not a Sunday goes by where my thoughts don't drift during the sermon.  Sometimes it's a struggle for me to keep my head in the game at church.  Sometimes I can't get past the opening sentence of the sermon.  Sometimes I can't find the book of the Bible the pastor is talking about.  Sometimes I get stuck on something the pastor says that isn't the main focal point of his sermon.

The last one definitely happened to me on Sunday.

We had a guest pastor at Weaverland.  And the sermon started in Obadiah.  I knew 0 things about this particular book.  It talks about the descendants of Jacob and Esau.  It's not a really happy book.  It has phrases like:  "Rise, and let us go against her for battle"  and "Because of the violence against your brother Jacob, you will be covered with shame; you will be destroyed forever"  and "The house of Jacob will be a fire and the house of Esau will be stubble, and they will set it on fire and consume it.  There will be no survivors from the house of Esau.  The Lord has spoken"  

Not.  Happy.

So the something I got stuck on that wasn't a main focal point?  It was a phrase that most people didn't even really hear.

The pastor took us back to Genesis to give us the back story of Jacob and Esau.  Dude, you want to talk about sibling rivalry?  I'll take my kids over these two any day of the week.

But back to what I got stuck on.  Genesis 25:22 "The babies jostled each other within her, and she said, "Why is this happening to me?"  So she went to inquire of the Lord."

Did you hear what I heard?  "So she went..."

This phrase struck me right between the eyes.  Rebekah had to go somewhere to inquire of the Lord.  My footnote says "perhaps to a nearby place of worship".

Here's this dear lady, pregnant with twins who are already fighting with each other while in utero (ugh!) and she wants to know why.  Who better to ask than God?  But she doesn't just stay sitting with her swollen feet and ankles propped up.  Nope.  She hauls her expanding self up and goes somewhere to inquire of the Lord.

Why?  

Does she need to make a sacrifice first?  Does she need somebody else to inquire for her?  Are there rules about where you can pray?

I don't know the answers to any of these questions.  If you do, please let me know.

All I know is that the scriptures say she "went to inquire of the Lord".  

And I'm left to ponder, if I couldn't pray right where I am, would I make the effort to get to a place where I could pray?  

And I'm left to rejoice, thank you, Jesus, that because of your sacrifice I can meet you anywhere.  

And I'm left feeling ashamed for the many times I don't bother to pray even though I have an invitation to come freely before the Throne of Grace.

The pastor wrapped up his sermon by saying he believes the book of Obadiah is an illustration of salvation.  We all deserve the fate of the Edomites.  Total destruction and death.  But when we come before the throne of grace and ask for Jesus' mercy he fights for us, just like he did for Israel.

And we can come before His throne wherever we are.  In the car.  In front of the computer.  In the shower.  While making picaken.  

Jesus doesn't care where, he just cares that we come.

Thoughts

I have a lot of them.   Chances are, you do to.  Some of them are good.  Holy even.  Some of them are hilarious.  Some of them should never be spoken out loud.  Some of them are downright scary.

Thoughts are the reason I started this blog.  I'm not so good at talking.  For whatever reason writing comes much more naturally to me.  Maybe it's because I can stop and think before each sentence.  Maybe it's because I can delete something that doesn't sound the way I intended it to.  But writing is always therapeutic for me.  My writing often takes me down surprising paths.  Like, whoa, hello!  I didn't know I was feeling that.

This morning our worship team led us in songs focused on repentance.  The comment was made that we don't often focus our prayers or worship on repentance.  We focus on thanksgiving.  We focus on our requests.  We focus on our requests for others.  

And those are good.  

I am positive that Jesus delights in our thanksgiving.   Philippians 4 tells us to rejoice in the Lord always.  It's good advice.  I know I mention Ann Voskamp often.  But her book "One Thousand Gifts" resonated with my soul so deeply.  She uses this lovely Greek word "Eucharisteo".  Go ahead, say it out loud.  

The definition is simply this "to be grateful".  Isn't that how the people of God should be marked?  By our thanksgiving?  It's amazing what happens to your outlook when you start looking for the gifts in each day instead of focusing on what's going wrong.  Please hear my heart, I don't want to downplay anyone's struggle.  There are so many heartbreaking things that happen every day.  But I very firmly believe that every day is also full of gifts.  Ask Jesus to open your eyes to them.  And then grab a friend and text them three things you are thankful for each day.  It keeps you looking for the beautiful plus it's fun to see how the Lord blesses your friend.

I am also positive that Jesus wants to hear the requests we make on our own behalf and on the behalf of our friends and families.  And even enemies.  Matthew 7 says ask and it will be given to you.  Philippians 4 says to present our requests to God with thanksgiving.  Matthew 5 tells us to pray for our enemies.  

But back to repentance.  Romans 3 has this to say on our sorry state.  

"There is no one righteous, not even one."

"All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

That's pretty gloomy.  And if that's all there was, there'd be no hope.  Hang on, though, I know this other verse:

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:  While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

And this:

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."

We sang a song called "Man of Sorrows" this morning.  You can listen to it here.  While we were singing I felt the crushing weight of my sin.  You might look at my life and say, "Well, you seem to be doing pretty good!  You're a good person!"  This is the part where we come back to thoughts.  You don't see what goes on in my head.  There are a lot of thoughts that enter and leave right away.  But then there are the things I choose to dwell on.

Jesus says this interesting thing in Matthew 5.  "You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgement.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment." And also this: "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

I think what Jesus is saying is that our thoughts matter.  Because our thoughts become our words, our actions.   "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." 

Ouch.

2 Corinthians 10:5 says "we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."  I'm not exactly sure what this is supposed to look like.  If you have a great insight, I'd love to hear it!  This verse always makes me think of another set of verses.  Back to Philippians 4 (so much good stuff in there!):  "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things."

When I have a thought that is not holy and I'm tempted to dwell on it I say this verse to myself.  And I always see the same image in my minds eye.  I'm in a meadow of wildflowers and I'm wearing a pretty dress.  The sky is brilliantly blue with fluffy clouds.  Jesus meets me.  And then we dance.  Sunshine, birdsong, amazing color, and my Jesus holding me.

True.  Noble.  Right.  Pure.  Lovely.  Admirable.  Excellent.  Praiseworthy.

Jesus wants to rescue us from the crushing weight of our sin.

All it takes is our willingness to say "Hey, Jesus?  I messed up and I'm so sorry.  Will you forgive me?"

"Man of sorrows, Lamb of God

By His own betrayed

The sin of man and wrath of God

has been on Jesus laid

Silent as He stood accused

Beaten mocked and scorned

Bowing to the Father's will

He took a crown of thorns

Oh that rugged cross my salvation 

Where your love poured out over me

Now my soul cries out Hallelujah

Praise and honor unto Thee

Sent of heaven God's own Son

To purchase and redeem

And reconcile the very ones

Who nailed Him to that tree

Now my debt is paid 

It is paid in full

By the precious blood 

That my Jesus spilled

Now the curse of sin

Has no hold on me

Whom the Son sets free 

Oh is free indeed

See the stone is rolled away

Behold the empty tomb

Hallelujah God be praised

He's risen from the grave"

Food

So if you know me even a little bit you know this one thing about me:  I love food.  I love to make it, I love to talk about it, I love to eat it.  

And today I'm going to write about it.  Complete with pictures.

For several weeks I went thru this weird thing where I was tired of food and completely uninspired.  So my family ate super boring things and were probably the happiest they'd been in ages.  

For real.  If you know my peeps, you know this is true.

Anyway, last week inspiration hit again and my kitchen has been a hopping place.

Last week one day it rained practically all day.  It was so lovely.  There couldn't have been a more perfect day to spend in the kitchen making and canning spaghetti sauce.  Of course there was a running commentary by Jake which made it even more delightful.

Wanda, I'll always be grateful for your spaghetti sauce recipe!

I also made and canned apple butter last week (sorry, no photos) and had a plethora of apples left over.  Then I read this blog post about Picaken and knew what I would use some of those apples for.

If you don't feel like reading the blog post (altho I think you should because it's amusing) I have step by step photos on how to create a Picaken.

What is a Picaken you are asking?  Well, it's a pie inside of a cake.  I know, that just blew your mind, didn't it?  So.Amazing.

Anyway, step number one is to decide what kind of pie, cake, and icing you want to make.  The flavor combinations are innumerable.  I had apples and it's fall so I decided on an apple pie inside a snickerdoodle cake with caramel icing.  It's also fun to invite someone to come bake with you.  Our friend, Cameron, had read the above mentioned Picaken blog post and was more than happy to come try it out.

Step #2:  make and bake your pie.  We actually made two pies since we had the ingredients and if you are already getting everything out you might as well just double it!

Step #3:  whip up your cake batter.  Pour batter into your cake pan to about 1/4 inch.  Cameron wanted to stick a ruler in the batter to make sure it was precise.  I said no.

Sidenote:  I wanted the Picaken to be round so I could icing it and make it look pretty.  But I didn't have a round pan big enough.  So we put a round pie into a rectangle cake.  I can't tell you how much this bothers me.  I will be on the look out for a LARGE round pan in which to bake my next Picaken.

Step #4:  dump your pretty pie out into the cake batter.

Step #5:  pour the rest of the batter over your pie.

Step #6:  bake that bad boy.  We baked it at 350 for about 40 minutes.

Step #7:  try to wait until it cools to taste it.  You should make your icing at this point.  Our icing was already made and my stomach was loudly protesting it's emptiness so I cut into the hot Picaken, plopped it on a plate and covered it in caramel icing which promptly melted into a delicious puddle.

Even though I was disappointed that I didn't have a pretty cake I don't think anyone else cared.  It was delicious and that was the important bottom line.  There's always next time for a pretty Picaken. And next time's flavor is already decided.

Oreo pie.  Chocolate cake.  Mint icing.

Oh, baby.

Before the Picaken making happened I made a TON of macaroni salad for a fundraiser.  And I also blanched soy beans for the freezer.  I rounded up some children to help with the soy beans and scooping the macaroni salad into little containers.

Whoops, pretend Jessie's hair is in a ponytail...

One child was not particularly helpful.

Ugh, there are no pictures of Kye.  He helped, I promise.  Also, I wish I had a picture of Larry mowing the yard.  That's what he was doing while we created the Picaken.  He spends around 50 hours a week baking so I guess he's not into being in the kitchen in his free time.  He was a more than willing taste tester though!

And, of course, when so much goes on in your kitchen in one day there are dishes to wash.

Lots of dishes.  I can't tell you how many times I've wished there was a kitchen fairy who came and cleaned up for me.  Until then I'll keep my hands in the soapy water.

What's the best thing you've made/eaten lately?

Date Weekend!

I know, I know.  If you are a momma or daddy of young children you are thinking, "How the heck did you get a date weekend when it's so freaking hard to find a few hours for a date night?"

Here's the thing, we've never done something like this before.  Yes, we've had weekends away without the kids and those have been great, altho few and far between.  This time, however, we asked Larry's parents to keep the kids for the weekend while we had a staycation.

And it was AWESOME because:

1.  No packing which equals no guessing on what I'm going to feel like wearing the next two days.  And also no chance of forgetting to pack something important like my glasses or underwear.  Uh, not that I've ever done that...

2.  I slept better because I got to sleep in my own bed.

3.  We could spend money doing cool things rather than spending money to sleep somewhere.

Now don't get me wrong, I love to go new places and there are many places I want to see.  There is certainly a time and place for GOING somewhere and I enjoy that as well.  But for this season in my life spending a weekend at home sans children with Larry was a huge gift.

Here's a peak into our weekend:

My mother-in-law picked up the kids after she was done working on Friday afternoon.  And then I did something I've been wanting to get done for awhile.

Yup, a new tattoo.  I know you don't all love tattoos (I'm lookin' at you, Mom) and I don't love all tattoos.  But I do love this hymn.  I want Jesus to be my vision in everything I do.  Since I am a slow learner I thought having these words always in my sight might help me remember to always look at life thru the lens of Jesus.

Next, we got a new ride for the weekend.  Larry and I have these awesome friends who let us borrow their motorcycle.  Shout out to the Landis'!!

There are two things I know about motorcycles.  a.)  They are super fun and b.) I don't think I ever spend more time praying than when I'm on the back of one.  Mainly one-liners like this "Sweet Jesus, please don't let us die."  

We rode to a diner we've never been to before called Wimpy and Dee's.  I stuffed my face with a mac 'n' cheese burger.  Then we rode to Trailside, filled up with gas, and went inside to sit down and have ice cream.  It was super fun to have no time restraints due to kids.  When we came home we watched the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes".  Have you seen it?  It's an old movie but I love it.  Favorite line (close your eyes if you don't like swear words):  "He won't sit next to a colored child but he'll eat eggs shooting right out of a chicken's ass!"

Saturday morning we had a delicious breakfast of bacon, eggs, and coffee.  While we  were eating I said to Larry, "Do you hear that?  It's our refrigerator running.  I don't think I've ever heard it before!"

Then we had to do some dumb grown up stuff.  While Larry went to buy dog food (do you know anyone who is looking for a male black lab puppy?  We have two for sale.  Ready TODAY.  Please come take them away, they are eating us out of house and home.) and puppy dewormer (gross), I blanched soy beans.  Yay.

Dumb grown up stuff done, we hopped on the bike and went to Lititz.  The weather was G.L.O.R.I.O.U.S.  Absolutely perfect for being outside.  We ate lunch at the Tomato Pie Cafe.  Which was a purely selfish decision on my part.  It's not Larry's kind of food whatsoever.

But here's the funny thing.  For the first time EVER, Larry ordered something better than me.   Um, I actually hated what I ordered.

Well, not all of it.  See that scone?  I could have ate my weight in scones like that.  And the soup?  Loaded potato.  Hard to hate that. Which leaves the burger.  A turkey burger.  Sounds innocent enough.  Topped with caramelized onion and balsamic vinegar.  I know I lost some of you with that, but still not a reason for me to hate.  Which leaves...goat cheese.  I never had it before and I was kind of assuming I didn't like it.  I HATE when people assume they don't like things.  So I figured when I tried it, if I did hate it I could just be a big girl and scrape it off.

Here's the thing about goat cheese, people:  It infects everything it touches with it's disgusting goat cheesy-ness.  The closest thing I could describe it to tasting like are smells.  Like, the way a goat smells is how goat cheese tastes.  Or you know when you've let a towel be wet too long?  That gross wet towel smell?  That's how goat cheese tastes.  I know some of you like it.  You can have my portion.  Forever.

Now, I mean no offense to Tomato Pie Cafe.  Their menu is amazing.  If I had enough dollars I would eat there every day until I tried almost everything on the menu.  Larry had a turkey pesto panini which was incredible.  I would have traded in a heartbeat.

After paying for one delicious sandwich and one disgusting one, we wandered around the adorable town of Lititz.  I made Larry go into a kitchen store called Zest.  It was super cool.  Plus they were giving out samples of soup which helped to fill me up since I had an inedible lunch.

Then we were looking for some dessert and found this gem.

I forget what it was called but basically it was a huge chocolate chip cookie, folded in half, stuffed with some kind of mousse, and then dipped in chocolate.  So, chocolate, chocolate, and then chocolate.  Sounds about right.

And that window box behind us?  Love.

So after Lititz we went to...Hershey Park!  Ah!

I love roller coasters like I love my momma.  One in particular has my heart.  Great Bear, I will always love you.

I think it's has something to do with how your feet are dangling.  I'm not sure.  I don't even have the right words to convey to you the depth of emotion I have while riding the Great Bear.  Seriously.  

Moving along.  We left Hershey tired and hungry.  Pit stop at Mcdonald's.  Props to their habanero ranch sauce.  My lips were on fire.  

It was slightly after midnight when we got home.  Such a lovely day.  Such a FUN day!

It's easy to get bogged down in the responsibilities of everyday life.  Most days can't be jam-packed with only fun things from morning until night.  But every day has gifts in it and we need to be on the lookout for them.

And make time every now and then to just cut loose and have fun!

  

Good morning from my front porch!

Sunrises are part of the reason why I'm glad I'm a morning person. These photos don't even come close to capturing the majesty happening outside my windows.

A good friend recently blogged about the lyrics to a Casting Crown's song that I've long loved.  Whenever I behold such majesty as this morning's sunrise I am in awe that the Creator of such splendor cares about every small detail of my life.

Even David had these same thoughts.  "When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?"  ~Psalm 8:3-4

You see the outside of me, the things I let you see.  Jesus sees it all.  My messy heart, my unkind thoughts, the things I almost say.  And yet he loves me.  

Unfathomable.

If you've got nothing else this morning to be thankful for, be thankful for that.

The Creator of the universe knows your name.  

And he cares deeply for you.

He is wild about you.

He rejoices over you with singing.

He wants to carry your burdens.

He wants to teach you the unforced rhythms of grace.

When the world hurls lies at you, cling to these truths.  Hold your head high.  Jesus made you, he loves you, he longs to redeem you.

Trust him.

Flow

It's been a week and five days since my last blog post.  Maybe you didn't notice.  My brain hurts, though, from the tangle of thoughts that have been cooped up and not been allowed to flow out through my fingertips.  I've said it before and I'll say it again, blogging is therapy.

If you remember my post from a few weeks ago, I couldn't wait for school to start.  I was living for August 27.  I even went so far as to say I was going to just lay on the floor, stare at the ceiling, and listen to the silence.

Guess what?  I've laid on the floor 0 times.  The start of the school year is HARD.  The first week the schedule looked like this:  

Wednesday, half day.

Thursday, full day.

Friday, full day.

The second week looked like this:

 Monday, off

Tuesday, full day.

Wednesday, full day.

Thursday, full day.

Friday, full day.

We are now in the third week of school and it's the first full week.

Maybe that doesn't seem like a big deal to you.  Maybe you are good at going with the flow.  But to me it feels like there is no flow.   And then, in addition to school, we are starting other new schedules at the same time.

My boys are running cross country so there are practices.

Jessie and Kye have clubs at church on Wednesday nights.

My work schedule is different.

I remember taking piano lessons as a kid.  There were some pieces of music that were to be played staccato.   In these pieces the notes were abruptly disconnected.  They were shortened and detached from one another.

I hated staccato pieces.  They made me feel on edge.  They made me feel uptight.  They made me feel hurried.

All I wanted to do is press the right pedal and have the notes flow into each other.  To be connected.  To form a continuous river of sound.

The last two weeks have felt very staccato to me.  We've not gotten in the groove of a new school year yet.  We need to find our new normal.  It will come, and things will flow again.  But right now I need to find gratefulness in the staccato.

We had an unhurried, rare evening at home on Monday.  It was glorious.  Larry and the kids threw a football around the backyard.

I sat on the patio and watched.  The patio was delightfully warm from soaking up the sun all day.

There were puppies.  I did not invite the puppy in the photo above to sit on my lap.  He just assumed he was invited and crawled up.

Uh, don't let this photo fool you.  I don't like dogs.

My dear friend, Wanda, gave me a necklace back in February.  

Wanda, I never told you this but I wear it on days when I suspect things won't go the way I have planned.  I should have been wearing it constantly the past two weeks.

Sidenote:  Wanda makes fabulous necklaces and sells them here.  If you ever want to get me a gift, shop Pearls N Joy.  Thank you.

In an ironic twist, the writing of this blog post has been very staccato.  I started it at 6:30 this morning but soon had to stop when the kids got up for school.  After they left I banged out a few more sentences but then had to leave to take Jake to preschool.  I met a few friends to walk, then went to Goodwill, followed by grocery shopping.  Ran home, dropped off the groceries, ate a few crackers dipped in chicken salad, and left again to pick up Jake.  It's now 12:37 and I'm almost done.

I recently read the phrase "unforced rhythms of grace" and it's been rattling around in my heart.  This morning I couldn't remember where I had read it so I googled it.  Turns out it's from The Message version of the Bible.

"Are you tired?  Worn out?  Burned out on religion?  Come to me.  Get away with me and you'll recover your life.  I'll show you how to take a real rest.  Walk with me and work with me - watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.  I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."  ~ Matt. 11:28-30  (emphasis mine)

There's a lot to be done.  My island is covered in groceries that I neglected to put away.  My kitchen table is covered in folded laundry that I neglected to put away.  Part of my counter top is covered in jars of grape juice that I neglected to put away.

The pantry door is hanging open.  My bed is unmade.  There is produce waiting for me to turn it into something.

But I'd like to have all that wait while I sway with Jesus and learn his unforced rhythms of grace.